The Guild Crotch

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This is based on Jonathan Coulton's song, "The Town Crotch". I got inspired. There's a good amount of WoW references and a few to my guild.

Inside Jokes FTW!




The Sleepers threw a party down the end of the Gold Road

I was barely high enough to go

Few of us could mount then, with no flight path there to ride

So the running there was kind of slow


She was in a conga line, doing a train emote

It was like I’d never seen a nelf before

Tight [Black Leather Jerkin] and a purple head of hair

With her ears she was six foot four

I recognized her face right away


She was the guild crotch

She was good to go anytime

She was the guild crotch

But I loved her like she was mine

There’s a lot of players I don’t remember now

But I remember the guild crotch


I had a stack of Darkmoon in the bottom of my pack

You can hardly taste the alcohol

Watched her from a distance but I never said a word

I was new and I felt so small

I was a n00b then, who was I?


She was the guild crotch

She was good to go anytime

She was the guild crotch

And I loved her like she was mine

There’s a lot of players I don’t remember now

But I remember the guild crotch


We stood around and drank a lot and danced along the road

Entered the 50/50 draw, but I was sorely out of luck

We got drunk and loud and waved to the passing Horde

Someone sung on TeamSpeak, someone Moonfired a flagged passing orc


More Hordies came to gank us, so everyone hearthed or ran

I had no mount, I was barely 33

She stealthed behind a Tauren, and she dropped him to the ground

Learn2plai she whispered me.

Then she stealthed away and led me out


She was the guild crotch

She was good to go anytime

She was the guild crotch

But I loved her like she was mine

There’s a lot of players I don’t remember now

But I remember the guild crotch

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