An Expanding List of Lessons

From my brain

A few words of wisdom from a friend. Not all of them can apply for everyone, but damn do a lot of them apply.

1. It is important to remember to completely discard all the negative things that people say and think about you, especially when those people don't know anything real about you.
2. You just can't convince irrational people their thoughts are irrational, no matter how nice you are about it or what evidence you present to them to demonstrate their irrationality. You'll cause yourself a lot less grief by just letting them believe what they want to believe.
3. It is important to know when to stay silent and observant and when to fight passionately. Choose your battles wisely.
4. When you've chosen a battle to fight, stand firm in your convictions while still being flexible enough to consider the possibility that you just might be flat wrong.
5. Keep a small, close circle of advisors who aren't afraid to tell you the truth about yourself and situations you find yourself in. Do whatever it takes to protect and maintain these relationships - they are the most valuable thing on the planet.
6. No matter how hard you try to prove yourself, there will always be haters who try to bring you down. Fuck. Them.
7. No matter what you're going through, there is always someone who is going through a more difficult time, who will help you remember that your life really doesn't suck all that much.
8. Banging your chest repeatedly, screaming to the heavens, "I'm right! I'm right! I'm right!" does not help anyone or anything - it only makes you look crazy.
9. During times of despair, you know you're still sane when you can find at least a tiny bit of humor in the situation you are in.
10. The saying is true, making assumptions really does make you look like an ass.
11. Sometimes hard work doesn't pay off. It's just hard work.
12. When the boat you're in with others gets tossed about, it's not every man for himself. Hold on to each other. You have a much better chance of survival.
13. Talk. Breathe. Talk some more. Take some more breaths. Sometimes this is the only way to get through hard times.
14. Try to give people the benefit of the doubt.... at least until they thoroughly prove they are crazy/an asshole, etc.
15. Not everyone is going to like you. Some (hopefully only one or two) will think you're the Antichrist. This is OK. Refer to Lesson 6.
16. A disturbing amount of people perceive women who have thoughts and opinions, as being a bitch, power hungry, bitter, mean, or on a rampage. The more disturbing part? Most of these people are women. Bitches, man...
17. If you can't figure out why no one likes or respects you and why all your relationships are dysfunctional, chances are, it's you, not them.
18. Bullet points are way better than novels that no one has the patience to read.
19. You should never have to utter the words, "respect me," "trust me," "love me," or "believe me." If you have to demand those things from people, it's most likely because you haven't earned them.
20. To quote the movie, Jerry Maguire, "It's not show friends, it's show business." If you're not mature enough to separate friendship from a professional relationship, then do everyone a favor and pick one or the other, not both. Taking professional disagreements as personal slights will make everyone loathe you.
21. Hold on to yourself. No matter what, do not let people rob you of what you know to be true about who you are at your core... unless at your core, you're an asshole, then by all means, let people rob you.
22. Even though it's not always the easiest or most beneficial thing to do, always, always, always take the high road. You're the only one that has to look at yourself in the mirror every morning.
23. Take responsibility for your words and actions, don't pawn them off on other people.
24. If you can't talk about something without being irrational and over-emotional, it's better to take time to calm down first. You and everyone else involved will thank you later.
25. Maintain a blog. Learn the art of un-blogging. Unleash your fury in private posts.
26. Sometimes you have to temporarily close yourself off from the world to get some perspective about it.